I finally found out about some of his affairs

[25yearsmlc]

TT,

I want to be clear that I too, support your desire to stay married. I really do.

But I have to ask a question of you.

Is there anything he could do w/OWs, short of living openly w/one of them, (and maybe even then) that would make you file for divorce from him?

IF there is, what would that be?

The other issue you are focussing on, aside from your presumption that you would not have suitors and (sorry, I don't know what mmmv means)
AND that he would be happily surrounded by OWs, indefinitely,

is that you want to KNOW what's going on. My presumption is not in his favor due to his lousy attitude towards you and poor treatment.

I'd LOVE to think it's his guilt/shame, but I fear it's not that...and I think you fear that too. Like I said, there is only ONE way to KNOW and that's to get a film of it. Won't he lie in the face of emails and letters and what most of us would consider damning evidence?

i mean, you have some of it but you seem to need more b/c he SAYS he's being faithful (while also not being kind to you AND being more kind to OWs, which in itself would make me want out)...I gotta be honest. It would kill me to see him being nicer to OWs who've done nothing for him, than to me, the woman who raised his kids and helped him with the business so much...

But even that is not enough to make you want out, so sure you are that HE'LL be happy and you'll have no husband...

so again I have to ask you, what is there that would get you to file or leave?

I think it's nothing, b/c every argument about how badly he treats you or the high liklihood of him cheating again or now, is countered by you saying "divorce won't improve that" and I hear you.

But I wonder how you can be happy feeling so powerless.

Can you?