Well... it's over my W is going down to file for divorce this week and I am tired, very very tired. I'm tired of hurting and crying. Tired of her lieing about everything. Tired of feeling worn out, like I was beat up and drug through a knot hole backwards.
So sorry to hear this. Based on what you describe above it seems pretty clear that you've been unable to detach so far. It's really important that you detach to rebuild your self-esteem, pride and PMA. You are valuable and you are a great person, but you're having trouble seeing it right now because of your sitch. Michele says in DR that it's important to remember that this person you are right now is not the real you, it's a person that is sad/ angry/ depressed/ in pain due to your sitch. So try and detach so you can find the real you again.
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Time to regroup again, focus on me and my children. Learning, growing, becoming a better Dad is my objective at this point.
That's good, but don't forget to include YOU time too. I think a lot of us feel guilty about spending time for just us, we feel like we're being selfish. But in some of the books I read the point was constantly being made that if we neglect that "us" time then we can't become fully independent and self-sufficient and content in life. When I finally said "screw selfishness, I'm going to start enjoying myself" that's when I finally started appreciating life again. It's not just about being the perfect parent or perfect employee or perfect spouse, it's about having FUN too! And you can't be perfect at anything if you're not also enjoying life.
