Life with a Cake Eater

[mizjjd]

I agree that it sounds exactly like that. He spins it so that it would be him "taking care of them" which, granted they are in their mid 80s and do have some health issues. But they still live in their own home, still drive etc. Even they say "they aren't at the point yet where they need a live in caretaker".

So I see H's desire as "running away" rather than "running to". He has, among so many other issues, regrets about his R with his folks. But I think the damage done there cannot be undone - at least not in a way that will make H feel good. And when he can't "fix" what he sees as wrong, this failure will only make him feel worse.

And on a rather amusing side note, they don't know he gambles every weekend. He in fact takes great pains to have them not know. (Got upset with me when once his Mom phoned while he was gambling and I told her where he was. Lol. Seriously? You're 54 years old and I'm supposed to lie to your mother about where you are? I don't think so.) I did ask him once what he would do about gambling if he lived with them and he said that in that case he'd have to tell them. But they'd be ok with it because of all the money he'd be winning. (Huge eye roll here!)

And no, I don't plan to say anything about what he left on screen.

More often of late, I don't like him. I'm forcing myself to let go of obsession with ow - some days are better than others with this. Definitely a weak point for me. But in the most recent R talk H alluded to "numerous women" he'd had "flirtations" with, but "most of them didn't go anywhere".

That sent me spinning for a long time. So badly that I couldn't even come here and write.

But the reality of my husband as a serial cheater is beginning to sink in.

I still believe that he's having a MLC, but it seems that's not the only issue.