reforce on me

[littleGTO]

Thanks, labug,ruby, Tallula & Tori!

I knew someone would pipe up that it doesn't matter WHY/IF H is in a PA now or not. But it does to me.

Tori, you are right that it might already be happening, but something just tells me it hasn't. Somehow in his head he doesn't think he's done anything "wrong/cheated" if he hasn't had sex w OW. The EA is at least as bad, if not worse, in my mind.

I DO still want to save my M. I don't think I'm being as positive w H as I need to be in the brief encounters we have. I try but it is SO hard when I get absolutely NOTHING in return.
Hugs have completely stopped now.

Today H said he wanted to ask me something- he asked me to "reconsider" letting the boys stay overnight at his aptmt. He said he feels like his is "losing them." And, he also said he feels like a "visitor" at our house now. (After 18 years of living here and only 3 1/2 mos. gone he already feels like a visitor?!)

I said, "That's sad you feel like a visitor here."
And, concerning the boys visiting his aptmt I just said, "I would like to see your aptmt first before they go there."

When he asked why (a bit defensively, like he didn't want me stepping foot in his precious space), I just said it would make me feel more comfortable knowing where the boys are & seeing it in my head. He didn't agree or disagree to this condition.

It may happen tomorrow night as I am going out w a GF and H doesn't want to hang out here all night.

I was thinking of you, Tallula, as your kids had their first overnight with their dad recently & you survived! And, my kids are older. S11 has a sleepover at a friend's house, so it would be the other two.

I think I am okay with this--at least as okay as I'll ever be.