Forward - I have been there with angry apology! I am about 7 and a half years post bomb, and have become more and more detached. I cannot say that I do not care at all, as he is the father of my children and our marriage lasted for over 30 years during which time I was very happy, and believed he was.

I am sorry for what he has lost and who he has become, which isn't quite the same as pity. I no longer need not to care if that makes sense. I can have authentic emotions about the whole situation without any sense of pain, which is very liberating.

I am whole without him, and he adds nothing to my life, nor can I see him ever doing so, but I can have him on the edges of my life, if need be without it bothering me.