Last Thur I backslid big time though and really pushed her in texting with a bunch of stuff; some pursuing, some cockiness, some sexual stuff. She responded just to try and get it through my head that she doesn't think about me, is happy where she is living and who she is now with. From my end, it was pretty much a total meltdown.
You've done this so many times and the results have always been the same. Not sure why you were expecting something different this time. Have you heard that old joke about the definition of insanity- "doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results"?
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I thought about things and really accept that it's over.
You've said that before too, but then you always resort to old habits. See if you can change it this time.
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On Sat I texted her saying that I now realized this and just wanted to wrap up our outstanding business. That we can coordinate her getting the last of her stuff moved out and I'm looking forward to it.
That's one of your old habits right there, that dig at the end ("I'm looking forward to it"). You threw that in there to try to get an emotional response out of her. Stop it. Just keep all conversations with her on a business level.
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She responded with some excuses and was trying to pick a fight. Basically saying that she couldn't believe I would say I'm looking forward to her getting out completely. I just didn't respond to it at all.
That too is "more of the same" behavior from you. You do something to get a rise out of her, then when she responds to it you shut down and walk away and act like "gee, why did she get mad?"
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I was doing well, fighting off any lingering thoughts of her and looking at things rationally. Seeing how I can move on with my life and be ok and that I'll be better off with her out of my life. Really not focusing on winning her back at all.
I don't think you've ever gotten to that point. But you need to.
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Now, today, I find out that my friend wanted to try and reason with her one last time.
HUGE backslide. You need to stop talking to mutual friends about your R. They WILL talk to your GF and she will always perceive it as pressure and desperation. If you talk to mutual friends then talk to them about your GAL activities and how much fun you're having. If they ask about GF just say you've moved on and are concentrating on yourself.
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and my friend says that ex and OM are having some issues. So it plants that idea of "hope" in my head
She's done with you for now, that doesn't have anything to do with OM. I wouldn't read any hope into their R problems..
