hey, oldtimer. glad i didn't run you off. i've read "codependant no more" and i got a lot out of it. i was too effected by my H's needs and happiness. now i'm trying to focus more on mine.

it's not easy. i have to tell myself many times to not do things that he should do for himself. he used to just have to mention something and i would get it, fix it, or call about it.

my H is a manager in his career. as such, he thinks people are pretty much his tools to get the things done he wants done. i used to allow that at home and with me.

our separation allowed me to do exactly what i wanted, when i wanted. now i hear his hints but i don't act on them. when he spots something he think needs attention and mentions it, i don't bite. i don't tell him i won't, i just don't do it. just because something is important to him doesn't mean it becomes my priority.

my life is my priority now. my happiness and contentment. i won't remind him that i won't take care of his needs but i will let him know, if he asks, if it's not what i want to do. i think he IS figuring it out. it can't be easy for him having things his way for so long...

thanks for dropping by. i appreciate your input.

M:63
H:53
S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23
M:15
T:16

Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways."
H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12
12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing