This is always a tough question, and you'll get varying responses so in the end you'll have to decide for yourself. Most will say just to ignore the day, but in my opinion it depends on the sitch. Your W is not pushing away from you like most WAS's do, so she may be expecting something (especially given her excited response to your question). My W had a bday after BD but before she moved out, and initially I was going to ignore it but in the end it just seemed like a really cold thing to do so I did have a small party for her and got her some gifts. I didn't spend nearly as much on her gifts as I have in years past though. So it was sort of "bday lite". After she moved out we had our 20 year anniversary and gifts seemed really inappropriate for that since she had just left, so in that case I called her and asked her what she thought we should do. Her response was "I don't know, it's just all so wierd." So I said "Why don't we just go out to dinner, it's not so much to celebrate the anniversary as to just acknowledge it." And that's what we did. Then at Christmas I contacted her and told her I just wanted to verify that we were just getting stuff for the kids and not for each other, but to my surprise she DID want to exchange gifts. So then I had to do some last-minute shopping, LOL! I guess what I'm saying is try not to mind-read what you think your W wants and just ask her. Say something like "given our situation I'm not sure how to approach V Day, do you want to exchange gifts, or maybe just go out to dinner, or do nothing at all?"
