RegretfulLA, that's great news about being able to refinance your mortgage.
I'm sure there are lots of things that aren't right in your M (as there are in mine!) but make sure you focus on what you can change and not on what he needs to do differently for now.
I hope re-entry wasn't too hard on both of you. I know that I find the initial times back together after one of us has been away difficult.
Me: 51 H: 52 T: 23 yrs M: 19 yrs S18, D16, S14 (special needs) PA: 2003/2004 Piecing: 2004 on Suspect H had EA: 8/2012-12/2012