Thread #8 - It's time.

[Navyguy]

25, hope the weekend went well. I hope you're taking today off.

I haven't done a good job staying in touch with my buddy - I think for the same reason I haven't been on here much. I needed a break from the drama and thinking about and analyzing my sitch all the time. I am still going to IC and that definitely helps maintain clarity...she has been great.

I will admit my clarity took a hit when W put the brakes on separating. This "push-pull" cycle we are in is crazy. I pull away, W wants to work on M. I start acting like we're M, she wants to pull away. We have been getting along pretty well, but I still see this cycle at work. Not good.

I have not had the follow-up convo with W yet. No good excuse other than me being a big chicken. Definitely have to do it before IC on Thursday though.

Lack of intimacy is really becoming a big issue for me. After a brief stint following the holidays, we are back near 1 month with no ML and no visible affection from W. Saturday night W and I played a card game until about midnight and had a good time. Once we got in bed I tried initiating, and got rejected...again. At this point, am I rushing things or expecting too much by trying to get her interested in ML? A marriage without intimacy is not something I'm interested in.

Things are tough for me today. I'm very frustrated with W and pissed off at myself for letting things get back to where I feel this way.