Sitting in the back seat!

[Occy01]

Hello from Sweden, thanks for reading my post. Feel like I have nowhere to turn and noone to talk to ( apart from my wife, who only wants to talk about practical things...)The story so far....
My wife and I have been 3 years married and 12 years together. We have two children. Our time together has been up and down, and I am first to admit that I have not always been the most patient father. I find it difficult to be an authority figure for our children, failing to be consequent and just 'whining' at them instead of being strong, when there are problems. My wife is sooo much better at that than I am, and as a result, they have much more respect for her, which I fully understand.
My wife and I have had our fair share of arguments, often ending with an apology and ' it won't happen again', sweep it under the rug kind of thing. Never really tried to solve our issues.
After a week away working in Stockholm,time to myself to think about where we were and about a serious discussion we had on the 2nd of Jan ( when she said she was afraid that we might not celebrate new year 2014 together), I REALLY realised that I had made many mistakes in my time, and decided 100% that this was the life I loved, with my beautiful wife and wonderful children, our life as a family and all our dreams.
On returning home, determined to work on our future, My wife told me she wanted a divorce. She said she had been unhappy for years. I was devastated. Still am. I told her about my 'revelation' in Stockholm, but she says too little, too late. Then proceeds lots of crying and pleading from my side, obviously to no affect. She says hurtful things like I only married you so it would be better for the children, Glad that it was a small wedding (22 people for 2 weeks in the Carribean!!) and that she's moving out...She has already seen 1 house, going to another on Monday (11 feb).
I asked her to follow me to marriage counselling, we go every week. She says shes there to help me understand that its over, but I hope for a chance. We haven't told the children yet, living together and 'pretending all is ok. I understand that she wants to move out, but cannot accept it. We wait to tell the children until we can give them concrete answers ( where they shall live etc)
I try to be strong and stop pushing her, but sometimes i can't help it, it gets too much. After a nice evening with the children, she suddenly changes the tone and wants to talk about practical things like buying her out of the house, selling the car etc,etc. It hurts.
Seems like the only hope I have is that in Sweden, if you have children, you cannot divorce immediately. There is a 6 month 'thinking time' between applying for a divorce and signing a divorce paper. Hope that during this time she regrets her decision... but my wife is very strong willed, when she decides, she decides.
Feels like she is driving a fast car towards a cliff, and i am sitting in the back seat. Any advice, or just a friendly word from cyberspace would be much appreciated!!!