Fear, what's that?

[eyesopen]

My fear with d is that there will be no chance after to r. I now that isn't true though. I have said it before, a piece of paper does not dictate my feelings. I think it may have been Cadet that said this, divorce=space. Maybe that is what has to happen. Who knows, I will wake up the next day regardless. I will continue to grow and improve myself.

Big jobs scare me because I think I will lose money on them and in turn lose my job. Same as above. I will wake the next day and find another company to work for.

I think my fears of these potential outcomes actually drive me to do the best I can.

I think I am also afraid that I would never be able to move on. Never love someone as deeply as I love my wife. And not because I am afraid that I risk going through this again. But because there will always be part of me that wants to share my life with her. And I would not be able to completly give myself to someone. Kind of like those people that always seem to be looking past you when you are talking to them. Again only time will tell if this fear is real.