I guess the GOOD thing is that at least now before I start over-analyzing things I KNOW that I am about to start over-analyzing things - so I can kind of short-circuit the whole process when I need to. I think there is a healthy portion of thought that I need to put into things - and then just let it end after that.
Frankly, though, I have really tried hard over the last year to get out of the "what's she thinking" mode.
I don't think that I was mentally prepared for the stage that I am in right now....her guessing and second guessing what she wants or does not want. For some reason, I thought this was going to be a straight-forward path at this point with no back-sliding or hiccups. WTF was I thinking? I guess I have been in the last phase so long I never really considered what this one would be like.
I guess I am often at a loss for why she is so fearful to refer to something as a "date". I don't question it, and I respect her wanting not to - but I just wonder what it implies or means to her. Especially considering she sorta referred to our last outing together as one.
So I am staying normal and supportive and steady at this point today. No real word from her yet - but that is typical and I am not going to hunt her down or anything.
Saturday should be interesting.....kind of like waiting to see which XW shows up, ya know? Happy "let's have fun" XW or somber "we need to talk through things" XW....either way, I will be prepared.
