1) What is standing to you? 2) How does it look...what were you expectiong to achieve? 3) Why are you standing? 4) What are you goals for the R and how were you planning to achieve them? 5) What are you looking for from your W and when are you looking for it? Yeah..yeah..I get you want to see "progress", well what does progress look like to YOU - not what the DB books says..nope..what and how does it look to YOU? 6) Someone that I have a ton of respect for once said to me and I paraphrase here..."chit or get off the pot" - "pick a path and walk it". In short, I was on the fence of "standing" - I too was dating. Bottom line, I came to realize that for ME...for what I wanted...no..for who I wanted to be, I needed to stand a bit longer. So my question is....do you really want to stand. Seriously, no bullchit, do you really want to get back with your W? Cause if so, I'm not sure I agree with some of your actions. FTR, I am not suggesting you sit around and "take it"...sit around and watch the "affair like a dog with a tail between his legs" - nope. I am suggesting that you be honest with YOU and HER as to what you really want in your life.
7) what does LOVE mean to you? How do you give it? How do you like to recieve it? WHat about your W....are you giving her love the way SHE wants it (once again, I am not suggesting that you sit around, eat popcorn and pat her on the back for HER transgressions)...my question is a little more probing then that..What is it that SHE REALLY WANTS...and do YOU LOVE HER ENOUGH to RESPECT it?
Quote:
Ummm, what form of cancer is it that puts her in another man's bed (or makes her invite him into hers) and makes her decide she doesn't like me, that's what I want to know,
Forms of cancer IMO.....
a. selfishness b. lack of compassion and understanding c. sense of superiority (i.e. being a subtle "I'm better than you cause I've done the "work" mentaility") d. lack of passion e. lack of respect
These are just a few of the forms of cancer IMO, that will reap havok on a relationship.
I'll close with another piece of advice that has bode well for me..and provided by the same person....
"Understand why you are doing what you are doing - make sure that is alings with who YOU want to BE and not based on "feelings" or what others want or think you should be".
So Another....I believe that if you really look inside you will get to the answer that you are really searching for. Question will be...do you like what you see and are you strong enough to face it and deal with it...for YOU and for HER.
God Bless Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
