reforce on me

[littleGTO]

I am always thankful when I come on here and others have taken the time to post, so thank you!

I tried to fill H in on things that were going on w our kids today, but he seemed impatient and cut me off (on the phone) "do any of the kids need to talk to me?"

I answered, "I guess you're done talking to you. S11 will call you later. Bye." I hung up quickly. I know, I know, not good DBing. Not detached. It just sux that he claims to "care about me" but his signals read "I don't give a $h_t about you."

Anyway, need to detach more, I know.

longrun, I feel good about how I look right now. Probably in the best shape since pre-kids. Lost 17 lbs upon BD & now am "tiny" (people say). I am working on a fitness goal (cycling).

H comes to house every day after school to see kids & I'm not here usually. Weekends we are running around w activities on Saturday, so it's really just Sunday afternoons that I need to make myself scarce.

When I have evening plans H stays here at the house w boys OR I leave them alone for a few hours (as oldest is 13). I am NOT comfortable w them going to H's apartment AT ALL. BUt, in the long run if we remain S I think weekends will need to be different.

Dreams--I've always wanted to go cross country seeing the sights and staying at different places/some camping. Don't feel brave enough to do this one my own w boys, and definitely want to share this adventure w someone.

BTW- I have decided to get a kitten for my boys for VDay! S11 LOVES cats! I think a family pet (other than our 2 guinea pigs) will be a nice diversion from H's absence. Something to give unconditional love to.