Hello AS - Thanks for replying to my Sitch its great that you have the time and I'm thankful. Ref the last part of your post above, this is what I'm fearful off. She will probably notice and it might make her sad but instead of reaching out to me she will move on.
You are quite welcome! Regarding your concerns, you need to understand that DB'ing is often counterintuitive. Our mind tells us what when we're losing our spouse? Beg! Plead! Negotiate! Reason! These are things that never, and I mean NEVER work. What does work? The opposite. Put distance between ourselves and our spouse. The lesson is you have got to set aside your instincts because they are WRONG and they will prevent you from doing good DB'ing! Think about this, if you tell your friends and family that you're miserable and will die if your W doesn't come back, do you think when they tell her what you said that she will find you attractive because of it? Will it make her want to come back? I can tell you I was in that situation with some girlfriends and when I heard that same thing I ran away from them even faster. But another GF I had thumbed her nose at me and moved on, and I found myself strangely drawn back to her. Why wasn't she pursuing me? How could she move on so quickly? I wanted to know! Think about your dating history, perhaps you have a similar experience in there somewhere.
DB'ing has been proven to work better than other approaches, so stick to it.
