Ah I have a little weight to lose, so no worries. It is very unusual for me not to enjoy food. I can't eat and when I do it tastes horrible.
I have up until now been sharing their struggles. But he doesn't ask or seem concerned about them. It's only been 4 days. They haven't left me on their own with him yet. To be honest he would have very little to say about the boys. He communicates on a very basic level. The boys were "fine" kind of thing.
Today was a not horrible day, really. Sad and empty but I get a better life. We are in our home, I have the boys, and I have a clear head. Sad and struggling, but I have support and a vision for myself. He is a mess.
Today I was cheerful when he called to talk to the boys. I asked about a bill that had arrived. I wasn't angry and I think that surprised him (about last night's lies). I asked him if he had given any more thought to staying at my mom's since that is where I told the boys where he was. In reality he is across the street and I pray that the boys do not figure this out. That he is with another little boy (their friend) and not them.
I will take your advice and write to him a little about the boys today. As a gesture of good will. Even though all of the news is sad.
