AnotherStander you always say such thought-provoking things. Thank you.
I do not take his actions personally in that I don't think he MEANS to harm me. I think he lies/cheats to fill a hole in himself that has NOTHING to do with me. He is not a vindictive person, but he is deeply conflicted. I feel pity for him, and a lot of compassion
YET on the other side, he has PROMISED (in therapy on Saturday and in a conversation on Sunday) that there will be no more lies, and there are no more bombs to drop. That very same day when he said he was going to my mom's, he lied. So that is his decision but I am disillustioned and hurt about the broken promise.
My main focus is how to help my kids. And his interference and poor parenting/communication skills doesn't help me at all. I need to shut out his lies from my world and focus on the kids and me.
I can forgive him. I think that is what I mean about I don't take this personally. I feel emotions of betrayal and exasperation but I am not flipping out and debilitated by emotions. I am tired of forgiving him for the same thing over and over again.
