I have to "take control" of the kitchen/cooking/menu/grocery shopping very soon due to the tax changes and health insurance premium rise...basically that killed what little slack we had in the budget...the trick for me is to do so without being controlling, coming off as controlling (one of those 180's of mine) and without damaging W's fragile self-esteem right now.
So here is what I am thinking of saying:
"W, you have told me several times recently that you do not like working in the kitchen, cooking or grocery shopping right now, that it is stressful to you. I have heard you.
Due to the tax and insurance changes, the family needs to stretch the food budget, like our Mom's had to do in the 70's and early 80's...I used to do menus, cooking, food buying and kitchen work for a living, and when the kids were younger. I LIKE to do these things, so FOR RIGHT NOW I need to "take over" this area until you have healed and then we can figure out what to change up. I think me taking the decisions, spending and responsibility here will help you heal by reducing your stress and giving you more "space".
This is not a judgement of your ability, just that for right now, it's something you shouldn't need to worry about while you heal. I will get the boys involved, S2 is excited to help already, and it will be something we do together, and I can teach them this stuff."
So that's how I want to lead this off, any thoughts?
Hopefully she'll be all for it...but since this was/is (idk her current status here) a control issue for her, I have to be prepared for resistance...and then any suggestions how to proceed?
Ya know, the rational, business side of me is just shaking it's head that this is even an issue, for an H to take over these duties...but the other side can understand her...she even has said, both verbally and via email, "I'm a SAHM, its my job, why can't I get into it and just do it?"...
Anyway, comments, tips, etc appreciated as always. T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
