arrived okay- car trip okay- i marvel that this guy can be what & who he is- and sit in a car acting naturally & friendly and kindly for two days straight.
Quote:
Sad really I could have lived the rest of my life happy w/h, gone into his retirement, and that phase of our lives with it's new life experiences, happy and secure in my L for him.
i know- me too. every time i write something - i just cut it back out- all been said to death i guess.
oh well huh: - now that i'm here i'm not toooo chatty. need more coffee. i always sleep a bit crummo when i switch beds.
this morning i'm (very unkindly) wondering if the only reason i'm here is to clean and remove more of my "stuff". maybe that's all it is - niceness aside. this business of being coldly realistic to self- no good spin - is very grusome. oh well- i guess it is what the sitch demands - no rose colored glasses. man, i sure miss my glasses!
i know you'll say- don't imagine things. trying not to, doing better in general i think in 'staying in the moment" and not letting my imagination go wild. that's with regard to possibl;e good things as well as probable bad things.
tra la huh? i'll come back later - i can't remember what it is i had to say.
xxoo just checkin in- alive and thankfully it's cool in fla - woo hoo
