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[heartbroken5]

So, he suggested you to take your time with the papers. Do it. Get very busy and tell him that you have other important things to do at the moment. But it has to be real. It will also help you to stop thinking about him every minute. I’ve been there, and when people told me to get busy, I resisted thinking that it would not help. It does help, even for a couple of hours. What can you do to get busy, any hobbies you wanted to do, meeting with the friends, etc.?

Yeah. You are right. I really need to get focused on my job. I have a lot of projects that I can dive into to keep myself busy. I have also been working out with a trainer here lately which has helped me to release some of this stress and what not. I have also joined a few meetup groups. I have been really aprehensive about going. I tend to break down when I hear people talking about their families and spouses. I guess the point is to just get moving right? But then again, the "friend" of ours keeps telling me out of sight out of mind and that I should go after him. I'm just confused.

He stopped communicating – use for your advantage, so you don’t need to answer about the papers. Stop communicating with him as well. Just like I said, make him think you are very busy. You don’t need to let go of hope yet. This is not the end.

You know, I appreciate this. I don't want to give up hope. However, according to my counselor I should avoid blind hope. Meaning that I should place my hope in R if I see H making attempts towards it.

I had the same question when my H decided to end the M. He didn’t ask my opinion. But, this is the way it is. You need to think about yourself. You will get through this, just give it some time. It will get better and you feel much stronger.

Thank you. I just wish that the pain would go away. It really hurts. People tend to think that I'm throwing a pity party or just need to let go. The thing is I am trying, but when that pain and hopelessness kicks in it really kicks my butt!!