>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Why are you going through with the D? Oh…I know, you are pissed off that she is with an OM. I get it I totally do. I agree with your position of….no contacting OM while you are in the house, etc. That said, IMO, you rang the divorce bell thinking it would “shake her as* back to reality”, which I understand; however at the core it is manipulation on your part. Why? You are spinning right now….you keep thinking that somehow you can talk your way out of this, that somehow you can TELL HER what she can and can not do. FTR, IMO, you cannot TELL HER. Your actions should be doing all of the talking – not your words. That is why I said ealier STFU. Stop talking to her. Right now, you are not in an emotional place to have a conversation with you. Consider this…1) chances are she is going to LIE to your face, which is going to piss you off even more. 2) She has told you how she felt, which is that she is no longer in love with you. So do you think you are going to be able to talk her back into being in love with you? <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Yes you're right I am trying to get her to look at her behavior Eric believe me - I wish I could go back to Monday I wish I could go back for a lot of things but I can't and I can't keep beating myself up for it now She made an appointment with a lawyer I suggested a mediator so she cancelled her appointment with the lawyer and we are going to the mediator Tuesday - you keep talking about my actions what should my actions be - act like I won't go to the mediator - Act like I will take whatever u dishes out ??
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>As for telling her parents, that is your call. I not saying NOT to nor am I saying to do it. My only comment would be….if you are gonna do it YOU better be in the position of “holding on to your nuts and standing your ground”. <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Not gonna do it.
>>>>>>>>Who filed for the divorce? Who contacted the mediator? <<<<<<<< answered above.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>You are at a crossroads buddy….personally I would do the following, but that is me and you are not me...so you need to do what works for YOU: 1) If you pay for her cell phone – cut it off. Period. Just turn it off. If she does not like it she can purchase her own plan.<<<<<<<<<
I don't she does.
>>>>>>>>>>>>9) Stop snooping, stop treating her like your property. If you do not want something done i.e. no texting OM while she is in the house – then cut off the phone! My point, say what you need to say ONCE and then act on it!<<<<<<<<<<<
I can't cut off the phone
>>>>>>>>10) Finally…….you are afraid right now….it is all over your post. Stop being afraid! You will survive this…how though…is all up to you. <<<<<<<<
I am trying Eric - I blew this up into the sky now I sit in the wake - my familu and marriage is gone because I lost my temper now I have to live with that how can I not be afraid
>>>>>>>Now…what is the game plan?<<<<<<<<<<
Mediator Tuesday I will keep you posted
>>>>>>>>Are you in the garden state?<<<<<<<<
No
If someone decides there is no goodness in you they won't be able to see it. I'll take a BLT over a MLC anyday !!!
