What I was seeing was all surface stuff, what was broiling away under the surface was something else entirely and what is underneath/ inside is what is driving the WAS. You are reading way too much into this and you are vastly underestimating how "done" your W is. You're looking for the tiniest signs of hope and placing all your chips on them. I know what you're doing, I did it too. And it led me to see a marriage recovery that just wasn't there.
That's me, I'm right there with you. I'm in about the same state as SM. Every touch from me comes with the expectation that it will spark something inside her. When I text her during the day and she doesn't reply, I know darn well she has her phone right next to her but is ignoring me, and that upsets me still. For me, how is that showing confidence and someone who "has a life"? I'm nearly killing myself at home doing all the chores and running everything, but it doesn't do anything in my standing with her, because she knows I'm just doing it for her approval. I still am....even though I try to deny it.
I keep reading all the responses to SM's posts, and I feel like they're directed at me too!! When am I going to learn? Probably long after she is out the door and far on her way to a new life. We have to shape up here, for ourselves!!
