Soul.Searching my way back.

[Soul.Searching]

Okay so things have been "messy" lately. Apparently everything wrong in his life is still my fault. He is such an arse hole.
So apparently it's my fault he only seen the children for three hours on Christmas Day. My fault? It's my fault that he turned up an hour late? It's my fault that I told him he could keep them longer but he said he couldn't because he had to travel home? It's my fault he "had" ( he wanted to.) move so far away and make it difficult! It's my fault that he didn't see the kids on his birthday.
Which yeah, that kinda is because I took them camping. It wasent planned by me and it was my only opertunity to get away. He knew this and said they could go.
He doesn't always see them on his birthday anyway but he said at least he could have given them a kiss goodnight.

I suppose it's my fault that he is having troubles with his work too? I guess it's my fault that he is looking for a new job now!

He called the other day and told me he was not bringing the kids back till the next day! He didn't even bother asking, just told me.
I thought school was going back yesterday. He dropped them home by 7am, which meant they had to be up by 4am!
Luckily I found out school didn't start until today because the kids got home and slept. They were sooo tired.

He also kept most of their clothes, says they were muddy and he was being nice by keeping them there to wash. Ummm I need their clothes!! He gave me back their sleeping bags wet and two loads of wet clothes. So we fought because I wasent impressed about him telling me he was keeping them another night or about not getting their stuff back!! Then he has the nerve to ask to have them in my weekend!

We fought on the phone too. Apparently I'm unreasonable because I didn't think my kids should have to be woken up that early on the first day if the school year.
Apparently everything wrong in his life is because of me.

I just don't get it.