THe people on the AD's always seem to say that very thing! "I see things clearly now!" etc. "I like who I've become" sure, that's what the drugs are suppose to do, is take away the feelings.. why? Because that's what causes depression.
No, you've got it all wrong. A/D's do not take away feelings, depression does. Let me tell you, you never know what people are going through until you've been in deep depression yourself. Whenever I heard people talk about depression I was always like "they just need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and man up." Then I went through it about a month after BD. The best way I can think of to describe it is it feels like you're dead inside, like an empty shell. You don't feel anything, just numb. Depression robs you of all emotions and you just want to cease to exist. You think you're worthless and dead already. And you have no control over it, you're just along for the ride. A/D's allow you to have feelings again.
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"Wow I feel so much better now that I don't have to fix that motor" but the kids begging to go river fishing are now hurting...
When I was in depression I didn't want to do anything. The A/D's brought me out of it and made me feel like myself again. Depression keeps you from wanting to "fix that motor". A/D's make you want to fix it again, and give you joy in fixing it. Again, you seem to have things the opposite of what they really are.
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Point here is this SM! Seriously, you're definitely fighting a losing battle if your wife is on these things! They HAVE to come off the drug before you can make forward progress that's any positive. They're not thinking correctly.
First of all, don't be in such a hurry to get her off of A/D's. There can be very serious side effects. My boss quit them cold turkey and went into a much deeper depression that landed him in a mental hospital for 2 months. He is now resigned to being on them the rest of his life.
Second, it's easy to let something like this be a crutch that prevents you from looking at yourself and making the changes you need to make to bring your W back. If you're convinced you just need to wait until she weens off and then your M will be fine again then I suspect you will be stuck in a holding pattern forever.
