Heavy Lifting Solo

[mamabird]

Wow. Sorry BD. That is a little bit of a blow. I wonder if she feels a little intimidated now that you have gotten your act together? I know if my H were in your mindset, I might feel a little threatened or something like that. As if he's moving on with or without me.

Can you just tell us, what is your W's reason for wanting a D? It seems like a lot of these WAW's don't have an actual "reason" other than generic unhappiness and there is usually some sort of OM hanging around who she is using for comparison. So even if you work on you and address the issues that she has, you're still not as attractive as OM. I would say most women want security so it would be unusual for a W to just walk out with no OM. I have a friend who did but 1) she had an open marriage for a few years and had OMs here and there and 2) her H turned out to be gay and that wasn't working so well for her! But mostly, it seems like when a wife leaves, it's either due to abuse or because there's someone "better" waiting.

Are W and OM still an item? Do you know?

And regarding you, well, I'd say you put in more than your fair share of work. You gave it your best shot and that is all you can do. I totally get where you are. Not where you want to be but you end up there because hanging on begins to be really detrimental to your own well being.