Limbo Land II

[jzoom]

First thread Limbo Land got locked. Going to repost the latest that went on just before the lock.


@MrBond "It seems like she responds better in conversation over the phone. Learn how to do that."
@suckerpunch "And if you're not fast on your feet, there is nothing wrong with saying, "I have to think about that. Can I get back to you with an answer" or something along those lines. You don't always have to respond immediately.

I personally think voice conversations are better. Text often leaves insight to interpretation. I can persoally read negative in, "Have a good day" if my mind is in the wrong place.

I wish my W wanted to speak over the phone more. All we do is text for the most part. I hate it!"


Me on 1/25/13

The problem is she has often ambushed me on the phone, it starts off innocent and then turns ugly and ends up with the interrupting, me being quiet while she rails, or a few times me just hanging up and then I'm accused of being the immature one.

I know I should be happy that she wants to talk. I try and tell myself that maybe since I've backed off she's being drawn back in. Guess I'll find out in a few hours, by then another posibility is going to be getting ignored or a reply text "nevermind" if it was something she needed earlier in the day or she just got pissed b/c I didn't respond.

Wow, just a bit after 5 her best friend who is a guy comes into my store. At first he just asks customer questions. Then loudly with other customers and employees around asks me if she's moved out. I tell him I don't want to talk about it b/c I'm at work. I have to tell him 3 times that I don't want to talk about anything to do with her. Then he mentions how he doesn't know what's going on and pissed her off b/c he doesn't know if he can make it to the kids birthday party. I say that's too bad and he leaves shortly after without buying anything. This is just after a couple days ago her good female friend came in and didn't buy anything.

Brings up something else though. Oldest boy and babies 1st birthday are both the first week of Feb. I want to get them small gifts, will this mess up my DBing? I'm NOT doing it as manipulation, I WANT to do it and I HATE I'm going to miss their birthdays.

Just texted her that I could talk and got this as a reply, "I found it then thanks. I needed my dress pants and I found two of them.". I replied "ok". Once again, something fairly simple that could've been texted but wasn't.

So I wonder if it's just as you say MrBond about her doing better on the phone or if this is her starting to soften a bit since I've backed off.



Today, 1/27/13:

I haven't had any further contact with her since that text. Yesterday I got some inexpensive gifts for the kids and they're on the dining room table with cards where ex-gf will clearly see them when she comes by the house again.

I'm having a really hard time not contacting her, not trying to convince her and the kids to start staying at the house again. It gets tough b/c I'm having more alone time now but whenever I get those thoughts I'm going through the DB rules. I haven't seen the kids in over two weeks and tomorrow will make two weeks since the last time I saw her. I just feel like I'd make more headway if they were here and I could just be calm, cool, and friendly around them.