Trying to move forward

[Dewayne]

I may not have put it clearly. Let me show an example. I understand what you're talking about, but what I was saying about the tv etc.. was she'll come over to pick Jordan up. She'll sit in the floor and play with her, or pick her up and sit on the couch with her and just start talking. I stay out of it then and lots of times the tv will be on, or I'll be playing a game. She'll start talking to me and then I'll turn tv off etc. Then look her in the eyes etc and let her know, if she chooses to see it, that I'm giving her undivided attention.

Now, for the "arguments" they're not arguments. They're her getting irate and coming off subject. Like.. I'll try to system line it.

Me: Did you start cutting your Celexa pills in half?

Her: Yes I did. And half of those I will cut in 1/4s.

Me: Good, when did you start?

Her: Last Monday. Why?

Me: Curious about side effects, have you felt any different?

Her: I TOLD YOU! I AM COMING OFF THESE PILLS TO PROVE TO YOU MY DECISION ISN'T BECAUSE OF THE MEDICATION! I'M NOT GOING TO CHANGE MY MIND ON DIVORCE JUST BECAUSE OF 1 WEEK OF CUTTING MY DOSES IN HALF. STOP BRINGING UP THE DIVORCE, I WANT THE DIVORCE!

me calmly: I didn't say anything about D. You brought that up. I'm not having that discussion. I simply asked how you felt, we were talking about the weaning off medication. Have you had brain zaps, bouts of depression, chest pain, stomach cramps etc.

Her: Well I'm not changing my mind, there's nothing yet to make me not want a Divorce.

Me: Look, if this is all your'e going to do is keep bring this up and yelling at me, I got go. bye.


Now, we spoke for 18 min's prior to that incident. She seemed happy talking about Jordan and her activities, schooling etc. Even about Celexa, her drug. But in an instant she turned it into D talk. I shut her down. She stopped me when I said bye and said "I didn't mean to get to that." and I politely told her "that's ok. I have to go anyways"

ANother example I just remembered. She was here picking up Jo again one night. She seemed tired, but our conversation was going good. She came over earlier than expected and we were watching a movie. She started talking and I paused the movie. SHe said "You don't have to pause it" I said "Yes I do, you're talking. That's what Pause and Stop are for"

So we chatted a bit, she was telling me about work and how her hours are being cut and stuff. Then suddenly Jo wanted to talk to her... she FLIPPED and yelled at Jordan. I said "Hey, she didnt' deserve to be yelled at, why are you so mad at her?" She flipped.

Her behavior is erratic. She was NEVER like this before. She never snapped. Never raised her voice at me or Jordan. She is fighting something. Since I've realized this, I've learned to become much more bending to her and trying to learn ways of calmly shutting her episodes down.

Hope this helps a bit. I have trouble saying things clearely, I apologize.