My goal is to change the dynamic of fights (i.e. not have them). If things start heading that direction my goal is to just walk away.
In your R which of you usually escalates the argument into a fight? In my case it was me. My IC taught me about the 3 levels of communication (parent, child, adult) and helped me to realize that arguments with my W quickly became P-C when they should be A-A. Ever since she explained that to me it's amazing how easy it's been to communicate with W on strictly an A-A level. I'm just asking because if you're the one escalating it into a fight, I think it would just make your W angry and frustrated if you then walked out. Now if it's your W that escalates them, then I would suggest telling her "I don't want this to turn into another fight, why don't we take a break and cool off, then we'll discuss it again" and THEN walk out. I think that's from 5LL.
