Originally Posted By: suckerpunch

This morning, she wakes up crying again so I decide that I am going to get my wife involved in this and call her. So far she hasn't been too concerned that this will really effect D.


Let me ask you, and you don't need to answer here, just really think about it. Did you call W because you wanted her to help your D, or did you call because you wanted her to know D is miserable? I suspect you were trying to rub W's nose in it. Maybe I'm wrong, but think about it, because if there's even a small chance that that's what you're doing then remember kids should never be used against the WAS. Regardless of what happens to your M your goal should be that the children maintain a loving R with both parents.

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Now, to me that means she was still in bed. It was already 10am, but I am sure she is resting after her hard weekend of partying.


When you're detached, this sort of thing will roll off of you like water off a duck's back. You've got to get to the point where nothing your W says or does affects your PMA. I texted my W one Sunday at 12:30 about bringing the kids over and she replied back that she had just gotten up, I just laughed to myself about it. I had been up since 7:30. Bottom line, you're now living two separate lives. You have to let go and let her live her life as she chooses!

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But, she expects me to get daughter dressed and bring her there to snuggle her mommy in bed? Like a short snuggle in mommies new apartment will make everything better?


But maybe it will! If you really thought that calling your W would help your D, would not taking her over there help that much more?

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Perhaps I am not being fair, but the selfishness is beginning to wear really thin with me.


Honestly it doesn't sound like she was being selfish. Selfish would be more like if you called her to talk to D she said "I really don't feel like it now, I just woke up" and hung up.

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I expressed to W that I was really considering speaking with the school counselor about daughters possible needs. W didn't even reply one way or the other.


I think you did the right thing in mentioning it to W, but it doesn't sound like you presented it to her in a way that demanded a reply, so if I were you I would go ahead and pursue that. My W and I talked about that as well and W spoke with the SC to let her know what was going on and the SC monitored S10 for us for a while and let us know how he was doing. I think it's a great idea.


Me: 60 w/ S18, D24, D27

M: 21 years; BD: 06-14-12; S: 09-10-12; D final: 03-17-14; XW:57