Hey Sunny! I do have to agree w/your therapist that is extremely rude to address a wedding invitation to your wife and guest, especially when you are still married and living under the same roof.
If her family didn't want you at the wedding in Florida, why are they now coming to the home and staying there? Is she planning for you to stay in a hotel or what? When did she become your mother and tell you that you have to stay home and watch your son? I realize you love being w/your son, but your wife shouldn't dictate what you should or shouldn't do. I think I would have had to call her on that one.
Well, it's interesting that she's ordered that many checks since you do most of your bill paying on line. Maybe she's forgotten that you do that or maybe she's planning an escape and is going to use checks. You know, when they act like teenagers, they tend to forget that you have to have money in the account and writing checks doesn't mean it's a bottomless money pit.
Why are you looking at new furniture right now? Don't you want to be sure that the two of you are going to be living under the same roof for while? Many times the mlcer wants to go on shopping sprees and then ups and leaves. I don't know about this one, but if you are working two jobs, this little venture would be put on the back burner for a while to see how things go.
I do have to agree w/your therapist...you do not need to be your wife's punching bag, i.e., the abusive behavior. I do think you need to do some 180's and just let her know that enough is enough.
Sunny, there comes a time when you do have to take a stand and if money is tight, you shouldn't go along w/her idea of purchasing furniture and I would definitely question her about the check order. As for her family coming to stay in your home...a hotel would be where they would stay after what happened with the Florida wedding.
If something isn't working, try something else. The most damage you can do is she move out. Right now, that probably wouldn't be such a bad idea because she's got it made in the shade while you are doing all of the work. She's cake eating.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
