Limbo Land

[jzoom]

I haven't had any contact with her since the last text exchange I posted Fri.

House has been a cluttered mess so I spent all day Sat & Sun cleaning up. Got the Christmas tree down, all the toys left in the living room stacked in the corner. Got the dining room table cleaned up and the kitchen cleaned up a bit. Then I went to work on the bedroom that her and the kids had been sleeping in. Toys everywhere and trash all over the place. Boxed up toys and put in the corner and got all the trash thrown away. Went through clothes in the baskets in the bathroom and put some of their stuff away in drawers and some just left in baskets/boxes and stacked up in the bedroom. Cleaned up my bedroom of clutter and started on some laundry. Sheets and clothes that were laying around in their bedroom had gotten to the stinky point so I'm working on washing that stuff so there's no smell. My bed is made up with the implication that if she wants to come back she'll be sleeping with me, the baby in its crib in my room and boys in their room. If she doesn't want to sleep that way then it's up to her to set up her sleeping arrangements in the other room.

I know everybody says I shouldn't want to take her back and shouldn't if she wants to come back. Where I'm at right now is that if she wants to come back and work on things I'm game and I'll take it slow. If she doesn't then I'm not going to show any neediness or anger.

The cleaning needed to be done no matter what. I keep focusing on that rather than how she might react to it.