Soul.Searching my way back.

[Soul.Searching]

More of the same vs being a doormat... It's unfortunate it comes to that but more of the same it is.
H used to ask a fair bit of me but it was never like he was asking me a favour, more like a demand. He asks but never says please and I know that if I am unable to fulfill his request, then he has a huge dummy spit.

He has asked a few things of me lately and I know he hasent been impressed with my answer. I don't want to spend three hours of my day to make his easier. I know with H the more you give, the more he wants.

Sure I could do it but I was feeling really used by H and it stops now.
I'm not just standing on the sideline waiting to fulfill his requests.

Dummy spit away H,.., I don't care anymore. It used to really get to me and leave me feeling like crap? Until I have in,., the only thing it does to me these days is makes me glad that I don't have to put up with his crap anymore.

Ignorant, dummy spitting, arse face. Why do I love him so???