When tapestries of life get tangled in the loom.

[25yearsmlc]

Bruce, I was so disappoointed to read your post and see how little you have truly changed. It's as if you have amnesia, or believe we do.

Now you're playing the victim card, HERE?

You claim to have discussed this with others. And they ALL agree that you were a fine husband. But Bruce, that's not true.

When you come HERE and tell us your story -- you get feedback about YOU NOT being a great husband.


Your w was in a foreign country (which depresses YOU when it's you, but was a mentally imbalanced condition when it's HER)...as usual, you paint HER as a nut case and yourself as a great guy who did "minor negligence"...wow...

You neglected her when the baby was born and left her alone ALL day, with a newborn infant and no help. When you were done at work all day, leaving her at home in a country you admit she didn't speak the language or have friends in.

Never mind the hormone changes (I've mentioned this before)--
Never mind the exhaustion she must have felt caring for a newborn 24/7...(I've mentioned THIS before)

NEVER mind the resentful "immature" h, who showed no interest in your son, OR HER,

but did manage to complain about HIS OWN NEEDS not being met...and you sulked.

Then some nights you went out to do your hobbies, instead of rushing home to help her or check on his progress.

You NEVER changed a diaper. You NEVER put him to sleep or read him a book or took him for a walk

and you never gave her a break..

YOU NEVER did a damn thing until months after she left you.

I cannot believe what I'm reading here. Below, is your version of what happened. Reading it, it's as if you have never posted here...

or read or believed a single word from any of us.

I read and re-read your posts,
They're absolut gold for me.


Really? I doubt that.

Your post here below, is a post written from someone who thinks all of what We've said is WRONG. You are still a victim. That's unbelievable, literally.

You still want to portray HER as being unreasonable/mentally ill and vindictive.

Why not just tell us facts and see what we think? Your spin on things is so extreme at THIS POINT in time, you now lack credibility to me.

Sometimes I think you are not real & you're here trolling...




So, a little bit of background : I wanted the baby because I am a family man at heart. W was not feeling well in her head back in France, young, immature, away from her family, not her language, not her culture, she got depressed mildly.

Even if all this^^ were true, what did YOU you to help her? Well, YOU wanted a baby! Not HER, YOU...There's a helpful suggestion for your wife's happiness...but hey, as long as YOU got what you wanted, all was well, right?

We got the baby, and she dove into it, become so over protective she wouldn't anyone carry him, and barely touch him.

I was kinda glad my W was so commited to taking care of him in a way. I thought it was maternal love,


AND.... she wouldn't bother you so much OR ask anything of You...


when it was unbalanced obsession.

Yeah, a woman with nothing loving in her life but a child, would have to be UNBALANCED to focus on the baby...

To the point of rejecting the husband and going back ten years in time, to the security of the home country, at mommy and dad's house, and now trying to sever the marriage knot.

Considering the reaction I have to this post, I think her choice to leave you and go home to a real family, makes sense.

Your own family was cold to her, but you only mention HER family not attending the wedding in YOUR country.

You see nothing one sided about your marriage or your sense of the world, and what you feel "entitled" to, which is a lot. It amazes me that you're so much older than she is.

Her letter to you was the letter of a mature woman, trying to survive with her baby. She discussed the issues you two had very much like someone who has discussed them many times -- with a man who isn't hearing her.

And now, I don't think you hear me, Bruce. Despite your claim that you read our posts over and over again, your memory is very selective.

THIS post below, shows me that you do not hear me.


My playing too much sports? In reality I went twice a week in the evening for two hours. That was my negligence.
Her other reproaches? I sincerly try to accuse myself, and search fault on me, but all who I talk to, say that ok I wasn't perfect but it is really minor. I try to convince myself I was the vilain, but darn, if that was being a bad husband, then I don't know anymore.
Maybe her spiel about negligence is not what really bothers her, that's only trying to justify herself.

Anyway, I have two questions :
- What is S supposed to write in the Valentine's card? "I love you mommy"?
- When I pick or drop S up, I get to see W for 5 seconds to 5 minutes (depends). If I act talkative, smiley and nice, it might be considered as pursuing, right? If I am silent and cold, she'll think I'm mad at her, revengeful or something. So, how do I appear?

Bonsoir,
Bruce.