AnotherStander, I responded a couple of days ago, but I think my post got lost. I appear to be off moderation as my last post went right through, so here my sitch again.
My wife said she wanted a divorce about six weeks ago and the papers came soon after. Once she dropped the bomb she immediately became very cold and distant. I immediately started doing 180's (before I had even heard of them!), but was pursuing very hard. The pursuing just made her more distant and even nasty.
Anyway, after a couple of weeks I found this site and bought "Divorce Busters" and started to distance. At first it was hard as I was in my angry phase and exploded a couple of times (verbally not physically). I didn't explode saying I wanted to get back together, but I made it clear I was not happy with the nasty way she was treating me. I even told she should get out of the house which she refused.
I have now consistently been doing 180's for six weeks (which I'm sure she has noticed). Every complaint she had about me has been fixed. I am also continuing to distance.
Now that she is being very pleasant and does want to spend time with me, I wonder if she simply feels bad about the way she has treated me? Or, is the distancing working and is she beginning to see the changes in me are real?
Although I have zero expectations, I am hopeful for the first time in a while. Like I said (and everyone seems to agree), I'll just keep doing what I'm doing and see what happens.
