nice post. nice outcome and wise "step back" in the face of his crabbiness & indifference.
i like it alot- you were wise & self-preserving. this sounds like detachment to me- so good on ya mate. (me being australian)
i hope to achieve the same someday. i am wierdly detached about h being with ow rite this very moment. i like your not-h so i'm going to adopt it.
thought for a second as i woke up of not-h laying in bed with ow - that very moment- didn't cry or up-chuck or obsess. just let it flow in then out of my head (well, mostly). out of my hands.
sent tiny little prayer up that IF he is ever going to realize what he's doing/done - it comes before i am irreparably damaged and gone.
i know- me, drama. i'm sooooooo NORMAL and PLODDIE in life-(all the extremes & drama is in my head & words? anyway-
i need to go find that alcoholic prayer about changing what you can, accepting what you can't and wisdom to know the difference.
this letting go of all power & knowing it is a wierd feeling. i keep thinking i can do better or do more or fix it or something..... then i remember i can't do one darn thing about it. like my sister & the drinking. i could go down the "shoulda" rd, but why bother. she's dead - it's over- never to be re-done or un-done-
same with not-h. he's slipped off some edge. his choice - i can't pull him back- i can't dig him out- i can't do a darn thing. i don't even understand- but probbly don't have to do that either - do i?
just endure - and put one foot in front of the other...
off to work on some junk- glad you're out there GLAD YOU HAD A GREAT EVENING. i swear- the kids - it's what it's all about- they're so forward-looking. not cowed or bashed down by life- fun, positive - yay... i am not bashed down btw - merely a bit clobbered, but by no means dead...
your post & success is an inspiration. As usual - today will be a challenge ...
