Dear BrightFuture, Sorry to not have been following for a while but just read your last posts. I am no expert but I think any sort of snooping and spying for information on my part ended in disaster and shame!! I felt I had not only lost a little of my 'moral advantage' but I also never found out anything that made anything any better. I think you want to know because the secrecy is worse than the worst truth and at least in the open you can address it and cope with it. I think I would leave it, focus on you. I would also avoid meeting your H. You are doing this for you, not to show him. I agree, it is not a game that I enjoy playing. After knowing someone so long why play a game with their emotions. But perhaps treat it not as a game but as a reclaiming of you. Believe the best for your relationship unless you have concrete evidence to the contrary, don't mind read, or interpret facts that could be misinterpreted. Be your lovely self when/ if you meet him but don't meet him to show him how you have changed: he may not notice, he may not care. I would avoid meeting him. Keep him guessing why you got so close but didn't drop by. Have him wondering. If you are right then news will filter back to him. The allure and mystery may be of interest
Good luck and thinking of you
Me 49y H 52y T23 y M17 y ??EA June 2012 with younger co-worker children 8-12
