Andrew, I agree with your statement: "Guessing it is more of the "pursuit / pull back dance" and minor second guessing of the sich / her outwardly mourning the death of our M."
Let her feel whatever she feels and be an observer. Otherwise, this will drive you insane.
Also, $$$ talk can turn things ugly (see my latest post.) People behave in even weirder ways when money is involved. Aim for fairness but always consult with the L or a financial advisor.
