This is just my opnion, but I feel that if you question how calm you will be around him, then I wouldn't make an effort to be around him just yet. That sounds like a recipe for disaster. When you interact with your H, you need to be calm, cool and collected. You need to be confident, nice and not all that concerned about how your life is going. You need to be "happily content".
If you feel you need to "show him" how you have changed, then you haven't detached enough. If you HAVE changed, he will see it, regardless of whether you dance around in front of him saying "look at me look at me" or not. You don't need to show him anything. Just be you. He will see that....hear it from mutual friends....family...during brief encounters. Besides, do you think he would expect you to search him out while you were there? It may be much more intriguing for him to know you were there and the fact that you didn't really care much that he was....just something to think about.
