What I'm learning from H stages, disappointment.

[albamarie]

Nero, How fun can it be to "get away" with what their doing, if we're not showing them it bothers us. You would think eventually the game is not so fun anymore?

My H says its the thrill of doing something "unacceptable"! Oh yea, who still cares, oh wait, nobody!

Now he's telling BIL that ea is using him and all he does is argue with someone he's trying to help, its not fun, he's even questioning why! And, he doesn't have me pushing him toward her, or talking about her so he can defend her and forget she's not fun. My silence makes him face his sitch at it is, without defending it, or making it my fault, it's all on ea to f*** it up all on her own.

Nero, you hung up on your H, he see's he can still get to you, make you mad and react, that gives him the validation he needs to continue feeling he making the right choice. This is how they blame us for everything even though they provoked it, it's sick and twisted so don't play along.

Ok H, I will talk to you another time...I'm on my way out, where, just some things on my list to take care of, by! I would have said to my own H, ok, well there is no need to come home...but we're in different sitches. Yours knows you can't say that so play your game by your rules!