Indeed it is good work. Years ago (same year I went to EE, come to think of it) I went to some ACOA meetings.
Although I DID REALLY get something out of them, one group I went to near work, also had a few people there who seemed to repeat their litanies against a parent, and then linked it to ALL their choices, even as 40 year olds.
That was a bit of a turn off but it's NOT the program, it was just a few people in that group.
But it reminds me that the labels we wear cannot define us. We are not victims of our parent's choices, today. Perhaps we WERE, but we are all grown up now and our parents get to be released at some point, for OUR choices and mistakes. (Good grief, I hope my children don't hold onto grudges about me when they turn 40.)
So a few Christmases later, I went back to the ACOA group b/c of my MIL and some issues that came up for her and me.
And sure enough the SAME guy was there, telling the SAME story about his dad "ruining that Christmas". This was FIVE YEARS LATER....wth? Move on!
He was so into being a victim, for LIFE. Never let it go and never forgave.
He is in his 4th marriage now OR he's again divorced. And still, HE isn't responsible for any of it. Odd isn't it, to get so much help all around you but to choose not to hear it.
Sorry if I'm rambling. PON, if you don't get what I mean, I'll explain when we meet next month.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
