ILYBINILWY

[FloydMan]

Okay, the other day RegretfulLA lamented that everyone seemed to have a bad couple days at the same time on these boards and I agreed as it looked that way. Now a few positives in one day… you and RLA (so far) and others going to Retrouvaille this weekend…AM and AS.
I think this is good CV. He is being vulnerable. His confidence is knocked and he is beating himself up a bit. As far as suggestion goes, I would say not necessarily to boost his ego and confidence, but rather not at all bring it down. He does need to help build it up on his own a bit but not being criticized for anything would be a 180. If there are pints you want to help him with, careful in the delivery of what would help without knocking him. Your question of asking him for examples put him on the spot a bit. You are aware of him not expressing himself and have knocked him for that is the past. So putting him on the spot may either get him to stumble and feel humiliated or to lie (his normal defence). I did this to my W so I recognize this now in the shut-down person. I am the talker, logic maker and W is the shut-down type. It is so good he wants to open up, just please make sure he feels safe and comfortable without him feeling reprimanded for doing so. It will only crate a gotcha or told you so feeling and you don't want him feeling lie that or he will retreat to his habits. You're doing great getting him to open up. Keep him there.