just wanted to chime in that I'm in the same boat as you. Have been in piecing for quite several months now, almost a year (incuding major backslides) but still,no R talk. But I've let it go as well, the way I see it is that we both are still not ready for it, and we are still healing. There was an OW involved in our sitch, and I think if we really started talking about it, on both our sides the hurts and anger will resurface and harm our fragile R. Best to concentrate on whats going good for now - our new found amicable way of dealing with what used to be causes for arguments is a big thing. And I see that in your sitch as well... like your latest post, Cor, about your first argument. I agree with your wife there - wait till the kids are out of earshot!
My take on the piecing situation is that action speaks louder than words. I can see that my H is working his way back to me...and saying anything about it and expecting anything seems to pressure him and cause backslides. It also is the same for me....I also feel pressure when my H sometimes chides me for things that I know I should have done, or that I ought to change.
One key thing that I noticed in what your situations are, thats the same with mine, is that in all of us, our recations to situations now are better. We are all more tolerant of stressful situations, of low times, of arguments. I think more than anything that is a huge sign of improvement.
Me:49 H:45 D:12 M:14 T:18 Bomb: 6/26/10 EA: 9/3/10, fizzled out slowly, now ??? 11/5/11 Retrouvaille Finally piecing.... Its peaceful at last, but we got a looong way to go
