I am not having any sexual. Relations. My daughter is going to be gone for a few days and I could sleep in her room but maybe I should keep the status quo. H is goin thru bills asking me what is owed. He is making his plans.
Stay the course and don't change anything right now. You are doing great!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
if not, it's www dot consumer dot ftc dot gov for the master site. You can search on there for free credit report and it'll tell you how to get them.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
Another question. Don't know when h plans moving out but I don't think it's this month cuz he's got plans to invite his cousins over in two weeks. I spoke to a lawyer today by phone and I meet with him tomorrow . Should I not be filing just yet so I can at least get another month of bills paid? I am worried bout bills.
Talking to a lawyer doesn't end things. Your lawyer should have told you that as well. Talking to a lawyer is a prudent thing to do to find out what your legal approach needs to be. I'm in favor of talking to the lawyer and finding out. You will find out what your rights are, what your next steps can be, and you can find out how things might progress forward.
Be careful of lawyers though. They tend to incite emotions to help their cause (getting more money). Be rational and thoughtful in the advice you take and don't be afraid to get another lawyer if this one doesn't meet your standards or if you get a bad vibe.
Peace, AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
I talked to tis guy for a half hour I liked him. I just don't know how fast to proceed. I'm kinda scared. Not sure when h plans on makin his move but he is actively lookin for a place. The lawyer told me to take half the savings cuz h is spending. But he is goin to buy my son a car which he needs and I can't afford so I want to wait for him to do that. He is also going to get D tires which she needs. I have no minor children so child support is not an issue.
If you can trust your h enough to leave the savings alone for the time being because of purchasing a car and tires, then I would suggest that you take a little bit out for now. You can always take the rest of funds out later.
Your lawyer has already given you some good advice. Did you discuss joint credit cards, health insurance, retirement and 401K plans, etc. w/you?
I agree w/AJ, some lawyers will spin up their clients so that they will get the ball rolling on separation/divorce proceedings because then are very much aware of how much back and forth communications take place when people are emotional over material things. If you can make a list of questions and can remain calm when discussing things w/the lawyer, then you are one step ahead of everything. Don't allow the lawyer to talk you into doing something that you gut tells you isn't right for you.
Good luck!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
"But he is goin to buy my son a car which he needs and I can't afford so I want to wait for him to do that. He is also going to get D tires which she needs"
Ummm.....could you afford to pay half if you had half the savings? Where is the money for these items coming from? Is he spending down savings that you are going to need to get you through a transition/divorce?
Also - if he's looking for an apartment, he's going to need first and last month's rent etc. - you don't want him to take that out of joint savings.
It's tricky, timing when to take half the money, but you don't want to let him spend it all first. Also you don't want him to clean out the accounts before you get a chance.
Make copies of ALL bank accounts, 401k statements, pension plan papers, tax returns etc NOW.
