I don't like that person and I'm not going down that road again, I'm not locking her out or anything similar. Plus, I thought having some sort of contact provides an opportunity for your SO to see your changes. Granted, I actually need to make the changes, but what I've noticed on these forums and from the book is when there are no kids or other reason to interact the leaving partner can forget the DB partner pretty easily. When there's contact from kids, working together, or a shared residence then you're at least in their peripheral vision to show change.

One of her complaints during the R was that I was selfish and didn't really care about her and the kids. Busy schedule, period, illnesses, hospital visits, the smaller side of "caring" so I was attempting to show it does matter to me - 180. But I also see what you mean about not caring if I care....why did she bring it up? Just to start a fight so that I can be the bad guy and she can justify her feelings?

“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Abraham Lincoln