I was listening to a lecture today about anger and it said that when we're angry, we're judge, jury and executioner; we are convinced that we are 100% right and we can only see the situation from our own internal lens of hurt or whatever is going on with us. We are not clear thinking.
This is great insight, not just for ourselves but for our WAS as well. This is why it's so important to try and defuse their anger as quickly as possible when it comes up, because when they're angry THEY are judge, jury and executioner, and THEY are convinced that they are 100% right. So WE have to detach and not react to their anger, because reacting to their anger is a no-win situation due to the mindset they're in! I think this is why Michele says to validate their emotions without agreeing or disagreeing, because telling them "you sound angry, I understand why you feel that way" instantly puts them at ease while trying to agree or disagree just gives them a reason to continue the spew.
