Screwed Up...Need help to fix!

[AngieG]

My H and I have had issues for a while. H travels extensively for his job (over 200 days each year). Haven’t slept in same bedroom in over 2 years due to H’s horrible snoring. If they kids were home, affection was out of the question. I’m a morning person, he’s a night owl…So, our sex life took a nosedive.

“My mistake” fed off my unhappiness. He knew the right thing to say, the right thing to do…We texted for a couple of months and the bomb happened in Oct. I broke it off after 3 weeks, but found out on 10/25 that H had a PI on me since mid Sept. H told our daughters before confronting me. He had all the gory details. H told me if I gave full disclosure, I would have a chance at reconciliation. I gave full disclosure and have been an open book ever since.

H and I spent a lot of time together during Nov. Had several sexual encounters as well during the month. He left for a 60day trip at end of Nov. Once he arrived at his destination, he sent nasty emails and now only communication has been about separation, which I don’t want. H sent D email asking her to help him with his online dating profile and that CRUSHED me.

I know I screwed up royally, but I am willing to do ANYTHING to put my family back together and right now, H doesn’t want that. He will be home at the end of Jan for 30 days. I’ve stopped chasing and sending emails telling him I love him. I will reply to his emails regarding separation and keep them as vague as possible.

Been put on meds for a while and have seen marriage counselor. Been DBing but need advice...Help Please!