Hang in there Carole, you are in a terrible place that most if not all of us have been in. It gets better. Time WILL heal. For now, stop reaching out to him entirely. He will call when he's ready, and then you can decide whether or not to answer
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015