Confused by WAS

[Grizz]

Thanks for the insight. Could be mind reading but I still think she is much more distant/unhappy when I leave. Possibly because I am leaving her with the kids. She has said that she does not want to be around me however she asked me to go eat with her and the kids twice this weekend. She will sleep in our bed a couple of nights then sleep in another room for a couple of nights. She still kisses me goodnight then leaves. I am totally lost.
Today has been a rough day for some reason. I have been down more today than the past few days. I actually shed a tear today for the first time in a long time ( by myself I must add). Every time I think it is getting a little easier it smacks me in the face and I realize it isn't. I still love her so much but, I am not sure how long I can do this. It seems like I am just torturing myself hoping something will change. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.