New Year, New Life (19 months)

[adinva]

Thanks SS, that is really helpful. I think if I weren't trying to provide my kids an idyllic concept of a family with aunts and uncles and grandparents, I wouldn't give a hoot about making a special trip out to see MIL this weekend. I like her, she's nice, but she's a busy lady and has her own circle of friends. She doesn't need me and I don't need her.

But I think kids need quantity time with relatives to get to know and care about and love them, and vice versa. I think it's up to us the parents to schedule that and make it happen. It would be sad for them to not know or care much about their living grandparents, I think. And plus - with their immediate family blowing up I thought it was important to help maintain ties with the extended family to give my boys a sense that not everything is changing.

I think this is a chance for H to see that he's not walking away from someone who is petty and vindictive but a woman only a fool would leave. I'm not going to count on him seeing that, but I know if I decide to stay home and let them go without me, that I can count on him NOT seeing it.